The first week is over

The month of January has started and so I'm going to push myself through life completely sober again.

Not that I'm drunk so often now, but for a while completely alcohol-free is not bad for anyone.
I write 'once again' because I have already participated with Ikpas before and even lasted 4 months during this sober month. It wasn't even difficult, at a certain point it really comes naturally. I certainly didn't miss the alcohol, the taste of the divine drink sometimes did. But there are also alternatives to be found, the alcohol-free versions in this case. Not always tasty, but definitely worth a try.

There were times when I didn't think so easily about quitting drinking. That was a long time ago, but you can notice in stressful times that this can still be a pitfall. Because everyone knows how nice it is to have a drink and immediately feel a bit more comfortable and relaxed. That intoxication can sometimes do wonders and then you quickly fall into that habit. Just a glass of wine or a gin and tonic to induce that buzz.

In my bad times it was more than a sedative and I daily indulged in the pleasure from the bottle. For me, it really remains something that remains true in the back of my mind: Watch what you're doing Mel! Take control of what you do Mel! I really need that voice, that mantra.

Now I am not going to claim that I am a heavy drinker, because I am not. Not anymore anyway. I have it completely under control now. In fact, if I drink, it's no more than 2 or 3 glasses, because I just can't take any more. Then I feel in my body that the alcohol is really taking over and I don't want that feeling anymore, so I stop. It's not a pleasant feeling and the next day is always so awful. I'd rather skip that.

But back to the present. At midnight on New Year's Eve I left the champagne (I had it before midnight of course) and switched to water. The night really didn't get any less fun, so no regrets so far.
I survived the next day just fine. After a fresh New Year's dive, we had a small drink at home with my parents, so wine was drunk but not by me. I don't mind at all at such moments to drink water instead of wine. People often make the comment: "Do you have a drink, don't act so unsociable!"
But I don't understand what alcohol has to do with socializing. trust me: I'm just as sociable without alcohol. Maybe most people feel a little more relaxed and cozy after drinking, but I do feel that way when I don't drink. In fact: if I don't feel relaxed and cozy, I should definitely not drink because then I will become even more uncomfortable and less relaxed. It's crazy how alcohol has its own effect on everyone.

The rest of the week passed peacefully. I went back to work and had dinner with the kids in the evening. Without even having a drink once. There were certainly times when I felt like a gin and tonic, but at those times I just take a deep breath and have a glass of water. Then go back to what I'm doing and why I'm doing this and all is good!

The first week is over and no heavy obstacles yet 😀 Hoppa!

Melanie in brief

My name is Melanie, I am 44 years old and a single mother of two wonderful children (a beautiful daughter aged 19 and a wonderful son aged 13). I've been working for the same company for almost 25 years and I had no intention of leaving there for a long time. Besides work and the children, I like sports - including running - I read a few pages every day and write as often as I can. I also like to go to a cinema, restaurant or have a drink with my friends. But hey, who doesn't?

I know I've had enough alcohol in my life already. But recently I was sitting on the couch with a glass of wine and my daughter said: “Mum again? Yesterday you already had a glass of wine…”

Apparently I did not realize that I drink a glass of wine to take the sharp edges off. Because I relax just a little better with that one glass.

High time to reflect on this, to get both feet on the ground again and to find peace in myself, without that one glass of wine in the evening.

I stopped drinking alcohol once before in the month of January. Then I didn't leave it at that one month. I lasted four months. After that I drank very sporadically. Much more often I just had a non-alcoholic drink (just as tasty!).

And now I start again with an alcohol break. In the full conviction that I'm going to rock this completely, that I can again stand still with a clear head during busy and tense times and deal with it in a completely different way than I have lately.